Author Archive
50 Things You Didn’t Know About Being A Cartoonist! (Part 1 No.s 1-10)
Posted by: | CommentsThings You Didn’t Know About Being A Cartoonist! (Part 1 No.s 1-10)
1. You have to be able to draw absolutely anything a client asks for. This is not quite as difficult as it was before we had the Internet. You can find most things on a Google image search. Years ago I used to have to go to the library to do research!
2. You can sit sketching absolutely anywhere! Sat on the beach drawing – WONDERFUL! I even take article that need illustrating with me on the school run. While waiting for my daughter I sit there thinking up ideas.
3. You can lay in a hammock thinking up ideas – and tell people you’re actually WORKING!
4. Sometimes you have to redraw a cartoon over and over again to your clients needs. (You need a ‘I-will-succeed-in-the end’ attitude!) Remember: They are paying the bills!
5. Sometimes you have to work really really late on an urgent deadline – even when you wanted to go out!
6. Then you might get another two very urgent deadlines at exactly the same time – you don’t want to turn work away. So you end up working all night and going to bed half an hour before its time to get up!
7. You have your thinking head all the time! Any ideas you get while down the pub or doing the food shopping could make you money. (You have to carry a small notepad with you at all times.)
8. You set your own working hours – but see above No.5 and 6!
9. I used to be a maintenance engineer/fitter in a factory when I left school – being a cartoonist has a better ring to it.
10. You can work with anyone globally nowadays – and just when you think your day is over someone from the other side of the world phones you up to do a job!
Just checking to see you’re there!?
Posted by: | Comments
Just thought I’d look in on you to see if you were at your computer,…….yep, you are. And you look gorgeous as always!!!???
Dragon’s Den invention goes crazy!
Posted by: | CommentsSorry I missed a few days – been working on my new invention
‘Home Helper Robot’ but as you can see this came to an abrupt end.
Back to the drawing board as they say!(As a cartoonist and not an
inventor!)
Humorous Greeting card design! Dug out from 1999 archives!
Posted by: | CommentsHumorous Greetings card design! Dug out from 1999 archives!
A publisher approached me yesterday asking for some humorous greetings card designs for ‘Sisters’. So I have a search around my archives and found this one which I thought was amusing around that time. I won’t be sending them this as it has already been published – but I might rework something similar and updating the wording for 2010. I’ll probably think up about 10-12 one liners and rough these out for this particular publisher to choose from. I’ll let you know how I go on.
Real Teachers Comments!
Posted by: | CommentsThese are actual comments made on students’ report cards by teachers in the New York City public school system.
All teachers were reprimanded (but, boy, are these funny!)
1. Since my last report, your child has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.
2. I would not allow this student to breed.
3. Your child has delusions of adequacy.
4. Your son is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot. (my favorite…)
5. Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.
6. The student has a ‘full six-pack’ but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together.
7. This child has been working with glue too much.
8. When your daughter’s IQ reaches 50, she should sell.
9. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn’t coming..
10. If this student were any more stupid, he’d have to be watered twice a week.
11. It’s impossible to believe the sperm that created this child beat out 1,000,000 others.
12. The wheel is turning but the hamster is definitely dead.
Cartoon for Valentine’s Day
Posted by: | CommentsFinal reminder for Valentine’s Day! I’m not saying I’m a cheapskate but there are 100 guys in my street!
Health and Safety cartoon illustration for Handson Safety Services Limited.
Posted by: | CommentsHealth and Safety cartoons get serious messages across in a light hearted humorous way. This is a cartoon I drew to give Handson Safety Services advertisement that eye catching effect. I also provided a signed cartoon for them to frame and mount on their office wall.
Funny Eye Test!
Posted by: | CommentsA friend emailed me this morning. I thought I’d share it with you….
If you cannot decipher anything, then try pulling the corner of your eyes outwards. Keep pulling until your eyes are almost closed…It works!
Humorous Illustrator – that’s me!
Posted by: | CommentsHumorous Illustrator
What’s a humorous illustrator? ME, of course!
No kidding.
Really.
Okay, so some people may say that humor is a lot like beauty—it depends on the beholder. Or in my case, the viewer.
But let me tell you something about being a humorous illustrator. I. CAN. MAKE. YOU. RICH.
Really.
Allow me to tell you what a bit of humor can do to your business. For one, humor to business communication is a lot like oil to machinery. It allows for smooth operations. When you communicate with your colleagues and staff in a lighthearted way, the message gets across easily, as compared to being gruff and unyielding all the time. This is also true when dealing with potential and long-time customers. Ask any advertiser, people get naturally drawn to products and services that are presented as fun to have. This is where you need the services of a humorous illustrator (again, me!), to make your product presentations eye-catching and interesting.
A humorous illustrator is also your tool in improving employee morale and enhancing the work environment. A company can commission caricatures of its top executives with motivational texts and messages and distribute these materials during special events such as company picnics and parties. The works of a humorous illustrator allows employees to view their bosses in another light, not people to be feared of but rather approachable figures who encourages them to give their best in work. A humorous illustrator can also make caricatures of high-achieving employees and these materials may be given as a form of award or recognition. Imagine the delight of each recipient would be!
A cartoon map drawn by a humorous illustrator is also an excellent promotional material, one that will surely catch the eye and maintain the viewer’s interest. Compared to all the other promotional materials, cartoon maps cost next to nothing. Materials like these also increase public recognition of a company or an organization, and may be even be used to provide information on company goals and operations.
Corporate entities can also commission a humorous illustrator to add funny yet effective images in their training materials and employee handbooks. Apart from providing some visual interest, these images also enhances their understanding of the text and may even allow them to remember it after some time.
A humorous illustrator is also one that understands the difference in injecting humor on persons and situations connected with the business, as compared to making fun of the business itself. This is how you can choose which suitable humorous illustrator to hire. You need to commission someone who understands your need to promote your business and presents them with just the right mix of humor and dignity.
You must know that all the attributes of a humorous illustrator that I described above are based on my extensive experience and background as one. And trust me folks, when I say that to get where I am now (25 years in this profession and still counting) I learned to take only the client’s demands seriously and let humor take the rest. And that, in a nutshell, is what a humorous illustrator is.
Funny Stuff – Police Officer comments to drivers!
Posted by: cartooninggenius | Comments (0)Thought I’d share these actual comments made by 16 Police Officers. The comments were taken off actual police car videos around the country:
1. “You know, stop lights don’t come any redder than the one you just went through.”
2. “Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they’re new. They’ll stretch after you wear them a while.”
3. “If you take your hands off the car, I’ll make your birth certificate a worthless document.”
4. “If you run, you’ll only go to jail tired.”
5. “Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that’s the speed of the bullet that’ll be chasing you.”
6. “You don’t know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?”
7. “Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don’t think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I’m the shift supervisor?”
8. “Warning! You want a warning? O.K, I’m warning you not to do that again or I’ll give you another ticket.”
9. “The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?”
10. “Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey poop.”
11. “Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven.”
12. “In God we trust; all others we run through NCIC.”
13. “Just how big were those ‘two beers’ you say you had?”
14. “No sir, we don’t have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we’re allowed to write as many tickets as we can.”
15. “I’m glad to hear that the Chief (of Police) is a personal friend of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail.”
AND THE WINNER IS….
16. “You didn’t think we gave pretty women tickets? You’re right, we don’t.. Sign here.”
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